I am ready to own my truth.
On September 1st, I wrote this post: Broken.
I had to, for I felt fake, limping along trying to remain positive and sunshiny. Trying so hard to keep this blog normal and happy, but failing.
I had to let you in on a piece of my heartache, so I could move forward in my tragedy. And, just as I hoped, you lovingly supported me. Wrote me beautiful emails and lifted up prayers on my behalf. Thank you. If you haven’t read it yet, please take a moment and do so.
For 9 months now, I have mulled over when I was to share what Broke me in such a way. How to go about it, asking the Lord to show me what to do and when to do it. Asking Him to tell me WHY I had to share this heartache.
And He showed me, in a way I could understand, that this hurt was not to be wasted. That He had plans to bring me hope and a future, that He planned to take the broken pieces of our lives to create a beautiful mosaic for HIS GLORY. After He showed me through scripture, He went ahead a confirmed it through 3 different people, who are from totally different parts of my life, each of them having no idea the other person had just said the same thing…..
I was going to be asked to share, to own my truth rather than hide behind it.
So it is coming, first thing Monday morning.
All of it.
This story I will share with you has been baptized and transformed into HIS story. Praise His name! We are being made strong, because God never orders anything without paying for it, because he is a Gentleman. He wouldn’t have us go through this without supplying everything we need to accomplish it, and He is, He has!
Satan already tried to stop this story from coming once, when he had my newer Dell crash. 3 computer techies looked at it and deemed it un-salvageable, even ones who had near perfect records of saving the un-saveable. I was devastated at the hours lost, the sleepless nights writing until wee hours of the morning, wasted.
I will not be stopped by the devil.
So, as the Lord prompted, I re-wrote the story and it is ready to share. Hours of tears, puffy eyes and sleepless nights have been put into these posts that are coming. 3 weeks of them in fact: Monday through Thursday, April 30th-May 17th. (Weekend Potluck will continue as usual!)
This will not be light reading, but I hope you’ll stick with me.
Now, I will warn you…..
The most religious may not hear it, for it messes with their “religious programing”. They have it all figured out, of course. However, they will gossip about it to their church friends…
”Did you read what Tonya wrote this week? What was she THINKING!”
Some will have pride issues…..
“I would never do that, because I do not sin!”
The pious will not lower themselves to hear, or receive it. They don’t want to get muddy with real life problems……..They are too good, too churchy, to admit sin actually happens, because it makes them feel uncomfortable.
“Tonya didn’t need to share that openly. Dirty laundry was not meant to be aired.”
No matter your stand, it is coming: Monday, April 30th, 2012 at 7 am.
I have been praying for you for 9 months. Yes, you my dear reader, that your heart would be ready to hear my truth.
Because the truth will set us free…..