Not Enough

 NOT ENOUGH.

I have heard these words more lately than I care to.  Most of them in my own head, but also echoing through cyber space, as women write me of their sorrows of unfaithful husbands and broken happily ever after’s, shattered hearts and destroyed self images.

  Why couldn’t I be enough?  I gave my all, my best…..and it simply wasn’t enough to stop him from betraying me.  Maybe if I was sexier, skinnier…..

These thoughts lead no where good.  Dale tells me over and over, “What I did was about something lacking in ME, not something lacking in you. Please don’t make this about you.”

It’s hard, isn’t it? Being betrayed in such an intimate, personal way.  It strips you to your very core, the place where that raw, aching emotion pulses and throbs with every beat of your broken heart.

We are not the only ones that hear this, it is not just ours. 

Not just women surviving infidelity hear that phrase, “Not Enough”.

All women do, at one time or another, as we look at our reflection in the mirror with judgmental eyes….

Not skinny enough.

Not curvy enough.

Not sexy enough.

Not tall enough.

Not full enough.

Not straight enough.

Not thick enough.

Not curly enough. 

Not good enough.

Not smart enough.

Not talented enough.

Not pretty enough.

Just NOT enough.

When we look in the mirror, stare at our image and size it up, comparing ourselves to the air brushed world we live in, we lose.

Every. Blasted. Time.

We lose because we are unaware that over the shoulder of our scrutiny, are the sharp claws of the devil.  The thoughts we have, being whispered in our ear by the devil HIMSELF.  We are mere puppets in those moments.

WHY?  Why do we let him whisper those lies? Why do we BELIEVE them?

We have the power to stop him, to make him leave, shrieking at the sound of the name of Jesus.

  ENOUGH, Satan.  We bind you in the name of Jesus. BE GONE.  We will listen to you NO MORE.

I am a child of God and Daughter of the King of Kings.

I am His Beloved and He has called me BY NAME.

He knit me in my mother’s womb. He hand-picked my eye color, hair color, demeanor, talents, and quirks, placed every freckle and planned every detail of me.

I am fearfully and wonderfully made.

Even the hairs on my head are numbered.

He bottles up all my tears in heaven.

He knows my thoughts before I think them.

I am made in HIS image

I am chosen, holy and blameless before God.

I break His heart when I tell Him that I don’t like what I see.

I sin when I make Dale’s fall about me.  When I roll in the filth of the ashes and drape myself in sack cloth of mourning.  I choose to STOP the path of destruction.

When you look in the mirror you should see one thing:

JESUS.

If you don’t, then its time to ask Him for new eyes.  Ones that see the beauty in which He has created you, your precious life, in His image.

It’s time to ask Him to give you new thoughts, thinking on what is good, and pure and noble and right.  (Philippians 4:8)

It’s time we throw off “self” and our self-seeking ways, our vain strategies to look younger, be thinner, look prettier.

When you look in the mirror, you should see JESUS shining back through a beautiful YOU.

 Because you take your Creators breath away……

~T

He Makes Beautiful Things

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