Sex Before Marriage {Part 2}: The Chemical Side

  Welcome to Post 2, if you haven’t read Post 1: Sex Before Marriage: Everyone Is Doing It, RIGHT!? head over and get caught up!

 Now let’s cover the CHEMICAL side of why God designed sex for marriage only:

the chemical side of sex

  This article comes from www.christianpost.com and I am quoting this article in it’s entirety.

  Dopamine, Oxytocin and Vasopressin are three powerful and important products released during sex between a man and a woman in a committed relationship and helps couples bond. When they are introduced in casual sexual relationships, however, they can cause much trouble.

  Oxytocin, a hormone produced primarily in women’s bodies, helps women become bonded to the object of her affection. “When a woman has a child and she is breastfeeding, she produces lots of Oxytocin, which bonds her to her child….when skin-to-skin with her child.” explains the report. Working together, the two hormones and one chemical produced by the human body during sex helps to bond a man and a woman together for long-term relationship.

  “When someone is involved sexually it makes them want to repeat that act. Their brain produces lots of Dopamine – a powerful chemical, which is compared to heroin on the brain. Dopamine is your internal pleasure/reward system. When Dopamine is involved, it changes how we remember,” notes a Conquer Series report.

  So when a woman becomes intimate with a man, her body also releases Oxytocin and she becomes emotionally bonded to him.

  “Have you wondered sometimes why a woman will stay with a man who’s abusing her? We know now, it’s because she bonds to him emotionally, because of the Oxytocin release during sex,” the report said.

  Also referred to as the “monogamy hormone,” men produce Vasopressin which serves the same purpose as Oxytocin. “It bonds a man to a woman,” according to the report.

  But while these “bonding” agents are great for marriage relationships, they don’t work so well for dating relationships because “you lose your objectivity when you’re searching for your potential life mate.”

  According to neuropsychologist Dr. Tim Jennings in the Conquer Series report:

  “When you have premarital sex, your reward circuitry is bonded to them now, and it will be much deeper and hurtful. Oftentimes, in breakups of people who’ve been sexually active, they can’t tolerate the sense of emptiness, so they rush into another relationship. The neuro circuits did not have time to reset, and so they’re impaired in their ability to bond with the next person, and they may become sexually active with them. This is just a repetitive cycle, and there are real impairments in bonding going on.”

  “Knowing how these neurochemicals interact and change the brain help us understand why sex is meant [to be kept] within the boundaries of marriage,” the reported noted.

  “You see the overtones here about God’s design for His pure temple. This is another reason why the devil attacks our sexuality so much because in attacking human sexuality, it actually interferes with human bonding. So, for those practicing sex outside of marriage, they are creating a bond with their partner, thus inhibiting their discernment whether they should remain in that relationship. God wired and designed our brains for a specific purpose: to bond ourselves with the person we marry.”  

Gary Thomas, from the book Sacred Marriage:

  “At any given time, the female brain contains up to ten times more oxytocin than the male brain. Oxytocin is the bonding chemical that creates feelings of affection and empathy. You want to know why women tend to be more invested in close relationships than men? Oxytocin is one of the reasons.

  There’s only one time in human experience when the husband’s level of oxytocin begins to approach that of his wife’s: immediately following an act of sexual intimacy. A man’s brain literally re-bonds with his spouse, making him, at that moment, more committed to his family, more satisfied with his wife, more invested in his home. Wives, why do your husbands want sex with you so often (whether they know this is the reason or not)? It’s because they never feel closer to you than immediately following that encounter.”

  Another fascinating little fact that Dale heard on Christian radio one time, was that there were Scientific studies done on this subject, and they found that men do NOT release the same amount of Vasopressin in non-committed relationships, actually making them draw BACK from their sexual partner!  Yet another reason sex is for marriage only.

  God doesn’t ask us to refrain from Sex outside of Marriage to PUNISH us, He asks us to refrain from sex outside of Marriage to PROTECT us!

  Tune in tomorrow for a Honeymoon Night Pep Talk!
Saving Sex for Marriage: From Forbidden Fruit to Free Rein…..

~T

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Sex Before Marriage {Part 1}: Everyone is Doing it, RIGHT!?

 Sex God's Way

  We live in a “IF if feels good, DO IT” world.  And with that, has come a shift of self-seeking, self-pleasing, self-honoring living.

  Believers are losing their way, because life is more focused on pleasing self, than God.

  The Bible is so so clear on the issue of sex and the beautiful gift it is, yet, so many God-fearing, Christian couples skip over that part of The Word.  Living together, sleeping together;  all before marriage…..

  “It’s just a piece of paper that makes sex legal,” the World tells us, “you wouldn’t buy a car without test driving it first, would you?”

  “You are going to get married anyways……” the devil whispers in the ears of engaged couples trying to wait but failing time and time again.

  But God says in John 14:23 “Anyone who loves me will obey my teaching…..”

  Simply put, your obedience to God is a demonstration of your love for Him.

  Easy enough, right? 

  I know you and your boyfriend or girlfriend love each other, but God wants you to put your love for Him FIRST, before your future spouse!  This is a HUGE part of your life to come, and the very foundation your entire marriage and life together is built on.

  When you disobey the order that the Lord has laid out for you, you actually rob yourself of the blessings to come.  Not only that, anytime you disobey God’s directions there are always consequences to pay.

  I Corinthians 6:18 Run from sexual sin! No other sin so clearly affects the body as this one does. For sexual immorality is a sin against your own body.

  I will never forget my 8th Birthday. I had been playing Super Spy Girl and had found all 3 of my birthday gifts before my party.  I thought I was so cool!  I would often sneak into the closet to peek at them one more time in the weeks before my birthday. 

  Guess who was totally bummed on her big day?

Yup, me.

  I thought it would be awesome to know what I was getting for my birthday ahead of time, but I was sadly disappointed.  Sneaking a peek at my gifts had robbed me of the joy of experiencing them for the first time as I pulled off the wrapping.

    The Bible also states…….

I Corinthians 7:9 But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion.

  For this very reason, we are already encouraging our children to Court instead of Date, and to save their kisses for engagement, or the altar.  We also will be encouraging our children to have a short engagement to help control that desire until their wedding night.

  What if your fiance says you are NUTS? What if they tell you that they have needs, and they sure as heck aren’t going to start waiting for sex now!

  If your fiance does not receive what you are saying about sex before marriage, ignoring God’s commands in the process, then you may want to seriously reconsider your decision to get married. Not having the same passion towards pleasing God and obeying the Bible, will only get worse in the future, and will lead to a difficult, unequally yoked marriage.

  Let’s stop tip-toeing around the HUGE issue of these dating couples worshiping together in church, praising a God who they are BLATANTLY dishonoring in their sex-before-marriage life style.  And while we are at it, let’s stop being afraid to talk about sex inside of Marriage, where God created it to be enjoyed.    

    Let’s tell the World the truth – that Sex God’s way is far better than anything the they have experienced.

  It’s never too late for second chances, or becoming Born Again Virgins.  Christ’s death on the cross covered ALL our transgressions, including anything you have done sexually.  We ALL have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God.  Let’s help each other see the truth and instructions to walk in freedom, outlined in God’s Word.   

for·ni·ca·tion (fôrn-kshn)  
NOUN:Sexual intercourse between partners who are not married to each other.

1 Corinthians 6:9-20  “Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived; neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor homosexuals, nor thieves, nor the covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers, will inherit the kingdom of God. Such were some of you; but you were washed, but you were sanctified, but you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and in the Spirit of our God.”

  “Sexual baggage doesn’t unpack itself, it simply slips into the bed beside you and makes connecting with your spouse in spirit and truth, that much harder to do.”  Joy from Simply Bloom

  Commit your relationship to the Father, deal with past sexual partners by praying in the name of Jesus and breaking those ties.  Do this out loud, together before marriage.

   The tears and forgiveness that follow will be a new kind of intimacy, and in the long run, keep your future marriage from being tainted from the connections to those other partners.  {more on this later in the week}

  Bountiful blessings flow when you do things God’s way, instead of the Worlds way…….

Now head on over to Post 2 and learn about the Chemical Side of Sex!

~T

More info on this subject here:

http://www.crosswalk.com/family/marriage/what-does-the-bible-say-about-sex-before-marriage-510492.html