Sex Before Marriage {Part 2}: The Chemical Side

  Welcome to Post 2, if you haven’t read Post 1: Sex Before Marriage: Everyone Is Doing It, RIGHT!? head over and get caught up!

 Now let’s cover the CHEMICAL side of why God designed sex for marriage only:

the chemical side of sex

  This article comes from www.christianpost.com and I am quoting this article in it’s entirety.

  Dopamine, Oxytocin and Vasopressin are three powerful and important products released during sex between a man and a woman in a committed relationship and helps couples bond. When they are introduced in casual sexual relationships, however, they can cause much trouble.

  Oxytocin, a hormone produced primarily in women’s bodies, helps women become bonded to the object of her affection. “When a woman has a child and she is breastfeeding, she produces lots of Oxytocin, which bonds her to her child….when skin-to-skin with her child.” explains the report. Working together, the two hormones and one chemical produced by the human body during sex helps to bond a man and a woman together for long-term relationship.

  “When someone is involved sexually it makes them want to repeat that act. Their brain produces lots of Dopamine – a powerful chemical, which is compared to heroin on the brain. Dopamine is your internal pleasure/reward system. When Dopamine is involved, it changes how we remember,” notes a Conquer Series report.

  So when a woman becomes intimate with a man, her body also releases Oxytocin and she becomes emotionally bonded to him.

  “Have you wondered sometimes why a woman will stay with a man who’s abusing her? We know now, it’s because she bonds to him emotionally, because of the Oxytocin release during sex,” the report said.

  Also referred to as the “monogamy hormone,” men produce Vasopressin which serves the same purpose as Oxytocin. “It bonds a man to a woman,” according to the report.

  But while these “bonding” agents are great for marriage relationships, they don’t work so well for dating relationships because “you lose your objectivity when you’re searching for your potential life mate.”

  According to neuropsychologist Dr. Tim Jennings in the Conquer Series report:

  “When you have premarital sex, your reward circuitry is bonded to them now, and it will be much deeper and hurtful. Oftentimes, in breakups of people who’ve been sexually active, they can’t tolerate the sense of emptiness, so they rush into another relationship. The neuro circuits did not have time to reset, and so they’re impaired in their ability to bond with the next person, and they may become sexually active with them. This is just a repetitive cycle, and there are real impairments in bonding going on.”

  “Knowing how these neurochemicals interact and change the brain help us understand why sex is meant [to be kept] within the boundaries of marriage,” the reported noted.

  “You see the overtones here about God’s design for His pure temple. This is another reason why the devil attacks our sexuality so much because in attacking human sexuality, it actually interferes with human bonding. So, for those practicing sex outside of marriage, they are creating a bond with their partner, thus inhibiting their discernment whether they should remain in that relationship. God wired and designed our brains for a specific purpose: to bond ourselves with the person we marry.”  

Gary Thomas, from the book Sacred Marriage:

  “At any given time, the female brain contains up to ten times more oxytocin than the male brain. Oxytocin is the bonding chemical that creates feelings of affection and empathy. You want to know why women tend to be more invested in close relationships than men? Oxytocin is one of the reasons.

  There’s only one time in human experience when the husband’s level of oxytocin begins to approach that of his wife’s: immediately following an act of sexual intimacy. A man’s brain literally re-bonds with his spouse, making him, at that moment, more committed to his family, more satisfied with his wife, more invested in his home. Wives, why do your husbands want sex with you so often (whether they know this is the reason or not)? It’s because they never feel closer to you than immediately following that encounter.”

  Another fascinating little fact that Dale heard on Christian radio one time, was that there were Scientific studies done on this subject, and they found that men do NOT release the same amount of Vasopressin in non-committed relationships, actually making them draw BACK from their sexual partner!  Yet another reason sex is for marriage only.

  God doesn’t ask us to refrain from Sex outside of Marriage to PUNISH us, He asks us to refrain from sex outside of Marriage to PROTECT us!

  Tune in tomorrow for a Honeymoon Night Pep Talk!
Saving Sex for Marriage: From Forbidden Fruit to Free Rein…..

~T

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7 thoughts on “Sex Before Marriage {Part 2}: The Chemical Side

  1. Mark Gungor (www.markgungor.com) uses an excellent analogy to describe the chemical mechanism of sex bonding man and woman that God designed. Take a strip of duct tape and wrap it on your arm. Tear it off. Hurts, doesn’t it? Now do it again. The more the strip of tape is applied and removed, the less it hurts and the weaker the bond becomes. The same is true of sex with multiple partners. The bonding attribute of sex reduces because of the intensity chemical release depleting (as you heard on the radio program), to the point the emotional and physical high from sex disappears all together. When people reach this point they react like any other drug addict chasing a new high, resulting in all the corrupt sexual perversions infecting society.

    Have the words “sex” and “boring” found themselves coupled into the same sentence in your marriage? The problem is not your relationship. Boring sex is an oxymoron. The answer is not a new position, a different room in the house, or a new toy (there’s nothing wrong with those things, but they treat the symptom not the problem). The problem is over-stimulation. Take 1, 3, even 6 months off from sex, whatever you and your spouse agree upon to reset your chemical balance. I guarantee when you come back together it will be the best sex of your life!

  2. Very powerful and much needed information!! I’m divorced at 42, but look forward to experiencing the relationship God has for me. I want to do it right this time, God’s way. Pray for me!

  3. As a young fiancee surrounded by very few good influences when it comes to sex, I am really appreciating this series. Thanks for being bold. 🙂

  4. Oooh so fascinating! Looking forward to showing my husband this article… he loves science stuff! =) And isn’t it amazing how God has designed it all?!? That we’re to be with just one for a whole lifetime?! Incredible! Thanks for sharing!

  5. Pingback: That 3 Letter Word….. | 4 little Fergusons

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