Haircut Help!

    As I write this, I find that I am at a Crossroad…..A HAIR crossroad.

 Hair.  Its such a silly thing, yet it has so much hold  on us! haha 🙂

  Most of my life I had waist length hair.  Clear up to when Destiny was a little girl, but it was so heavy and long that ponytails made me have a headache.

Oh my word, I look like I am 13 here! I am guessing I was about 24 years old, and finally letting my natural curl show up.
Weird fact, its only bumps and waves until it gets a certain length, then it starts to curl.

  Anyhow, back in high school I took 45 minutes to dry and 15 to straighten my hair every day. Oh the glory days of having hours upon hours to work on my appearance. Haha! 

  Having thick, coarse hair that is neither straight, nor really curly, means I have to work hard to achieve either.  So, when I started having babies 2, 3 then 4, it got shorter and shorter, then longer again, in hopes of a lighter ponytail for fast hair days with 4 kids and no time!




9 months PG with Paxton

  I always like long hair best, it’s like my security blanket I guess, because I promptly grew it out again. 

  I found a shoulder length style I LOOOOVED, but after a while, those half straight-half curly parts stopped working as well.  Sigh.
  Dale and Tonya-1
My favorite part of this above hairstyle, when it was working, was the fun big bouffant ponytail I could do at the top of my head.  It looked like an updo, because no ponytail holder showed at all.  Loved it! Miss it. But alas, it left me and started laying flatter and flatter.   Boooo, mean hair, booooo!

  Over the past year,  I took my hair the shortest it has ever been in the back, with a sharp angle to the front.

Then later, added straight across bangs, much to the dismay of my family, my husband and my best friend.

WHAT?! I thought they were FUN!!!! Smile

Fine. I promise to never ever ever do a blunt straight across bang again, only the angled kind.

{Or at least not for a longlong time}

I spent all summer growing the bangs back out, and did lots of hair pulled back, like in the birthday photos we shared, 

french braided like a hair headband,


or hiding it all under a big scarf.
Which by the way, is sooooo easy and fun!  Maybe I should just keep doing THAT.  Hmmmm.

IMG_8931 10696416_10154542826895705_1206928285383680467_n

  Now that we have been caught up on Tonya Hair History, we have arrived at the crossroads part…..

Do I go back to one of the above styles?

Do I just keep doing headscarves and buy myself some time?

Or do I do one of THESE?   1
This would mean going the shortest I have ever, ever, ever, ever gone, and just get it over with, and crossed off my bucket list.  Thinking about it makes me a cross between excited and throwing up.  So that isn’t really a good answer. 



My goal is to a) feel fabulous and b) not have to take a lot of time to do my hair each day.

What do YOU think I should do?

Hugs, T



28 thoughts on “Haircut Help!

  1. Good morning! I’m so excited you asked…I LOOOOOVE HAIR!!! Not so much fixing it, but going to a salon feeling eehhh and coming out looking fabulous!! 😉 I personally like the very last picture in both sets. I think no matter what you do, you’ll look absolutely stunning!! You’re such a beautiful person inside and out, your radiance will shine regardless of the hairstyle you’re wearing. 🙂
    That being said —- It’s hair! It’ll grow back! CUT IT OFF!!! 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂

  2. I love your long hair! It gives you such a sweet, soft look!

    Personally, my hair is much easier long as it flipped every which way short.

    Whatever we think matters about zero though. Go with your hubby on this one!

  3. I say just go ahead and cut it. I like the top right of the second group. I have had min cut like that and trust me when I say it is super easy.

  4. My favorite of you is the one you had with Avery and Pax or the shoulder length. I wonder if you wouldn’t really end up liking most of the real short hair styles because they have bangs. I tend to cut mine to a medium length once a year and then grow it back out to shoulder length when I want a ponytail again. But then when I am sick of the fact that all I do is wear a boring ponytail I cut it again. Oh hair!

  5. Most bottom left pic! You have beautiful eyes so I think this would really accentuate them. I am growing out my bangs too. Can you show a post on how to do the scarf thing? It looks like you tie it in a cuter way than just under your head. What length/width is it? Want to try it! 🙂

  6. My suggestion is to go back to a shoulder length style. That style looks great on you, and seems like it could offer you many options. Best of luck with your decision! 🙂

  7. I think a short, sassy, spikey cut would be great. Easy to care for. (At least those who have those cuts tell me). I think every/anything looks great on you. Can’t wait to see what you’ll do.

  8. Hey there, you look great with any style and short hair is so fun and can be easier. However, what does your hubby think? I always think that we should try and please them since they are the one we want to be attracted to us 🙂 PLus 1 corinthians 11:15 “But if a woman have long hair, it is a glory to her: for her hair is given her for a covering”. Right now I had to chop mine off to just past my chin because three babies in 3 1/2 years my long, thick, curly hair is now limp, thin and falling out like crazy. I do hope to grow it out again because my hubby loves it long and I am praying and trying to understand the passage in 1 corinthians. Love your blog, Many Blessings 🙂

  9. No bangs no bangs no bangs!! You have such a pretty face that the bangs seem to hide it! I think a length just barely touching the collarbone would be good. Kind of like the very last picture of your with your mom and Destiny

  10. I think the bottom left in the top set of pictures and then when you want something different, you could grow it out to the one beside it (bottom right)

  11. I too used to have very long hair. Mine is very thin, fine, crazy wavy with no real pattern to it. I used to spend hours trying to spray it into submission that by the time I got to work it was limp again and I just pulled it back into a clip. My hair is so fine that I could pull all 14 inches of it into one clip. My cousin is a stylist and she was the only one I ever let cut my hair because she knew how to handle the crazy waves. One day I went to her and said cut it off. Cut it all off. I went PIXIE short. And it’s been that way for 18 years. I’ve tried to let it grow long again but I can’t. I can’t stand it touching my neck or my face, makes me itch and drives me crazy. Since my cousin and I are 13 hours away from each other I had to find a new stylist, and I love my new one. She too understands my hair. About 2 years ago we tried to let it grow again and she said nope, ain’t happening. So off it went again. And it works so well for me. My crazy wave is just at the correct length to make it curl and it looks fuller with it short and natural color with gray and all, with my wild berry colored glasses and bright blue eyes, it’s just amazing (if I do say so myself). So my suggestion is go short. Try it just once, if it doesn’t turn out as fabulous as you want it really doesn’t take long to grow it back out. But I promise you’ll love it after the first week. Good luck.

  12. Gosh, I am not the best one to answer this one?! My hair well I sit on it-very long. Each 6-7 year period (I have done it twice) I donate 14-17 inches to “Locks Of Love” for cancer patients. I have been debating cutting it again. I just would not be me without long hair? In the intense Florida Heat it is pulled up most times anyway. One good thing is it grows back very quickly! Good luck in the decision T.

  13. My mom (48) just went through a similar crossroad! She went to the salon having considered a pixie cut for the longest time, but not having the guts to follow through and ended up coming home with a chin length style. She ended up going back two days later and getting the pixie. It looks great and she loves it…super easy! I think you could totally pull off the pixie! My favorite is your shoulder length, but you look great with so many styles!

  14. I like the blonde with the zebra stripe shirt hairdo the best. I would go for it, as your hair is already pretty short, now would be the easiest transition. I also have four kids, and dream of having a super cool and chic short do, that would be fast to fix. My hair is long now. My biggest fear is that the convenience of short hair would take over and I would never bring myself back to having long hair!

  15. Awe Tonya! I really liked your hair when at shoulder length! (Or what you have had recently with the sharp and short “A-line”) You have such gorgeous hair 🙂 I too like longer hair, but it sure gets to be a pain to quickly style and put up 😛 Ya’ know what you really should do before cutting it short again?!? Try Lilla Rose’s hair accessories! (Esp the Flexi clips) ….cause they’re super easy to use (they literally are my lifesaver right now!), really fast for us busy moms-on-the-go, and you could do every style possible with your hair and yet still keep it longer!! 🙂 I was going to cut my hair when we moved to Arizona but the air tried the Flexi ….and I still have my long hair! Lol. Plus I am learning I can do all sorts of cool hair stuff in 10minutes or less, with no headaches. 🙂 Ahhhh…. Happy me!
    If you really really want to cut it, 🙂 ….I like the two bottom left pictures! 😉

  16. I love the one of you and dale out in the field with the plaid shirt on. My experience with short hair is the shorter you go the harder it is for me to deal with. Short hair it seems you can’t just wake up and go because a lot of the times there are so many pieces sticking up here and there. I personally like a medium cut where you can still put it in a cute pony if needed.

  17. Be patient, and let it grow! I have been in that awful growing out stage and wanted to just cut it, but I am so happy I didn’t. I think if you cut your hair you will be sorry like I was especially if you are more comfortable with long hair. You look so pretty with the medium length too. It’s easy for others to say it’s just hair cut it , but that growing out period is awful. Don’t do it!!

  18. cut it! i got a pixie about a year ago and it is SO easy. the hardest part for me is getting trims every 6 weeks or so, otherwise it looks baddd in the back/sides. it doesn’t look great first thing in the morning but i can use a little water/headband/bobby pin action to calm it down if i won’t be showering right away. i can let it air dry most of the way and then blow dry it in place in less than 5 minutes. there are a few ways i can style it depending on how i part it or what product i use (or not). i love it. i think sometimes its easy for women to hide behind their hair but with short hair, you can’t do it. i think the first cluster of photos is best, esp. the top left or bottom right. good luck on the decision!!

  19. Cut it off!! When I cut my hair into a pixie (a million years ago), I remember looking into the mirror and saying, “Ah, there I am. This IS ME!!” All these years later, I’m still rocking the pixie. Once in a while, I let it grow out a little tiny bit, just for something different and then I go right back to a pixie. Do it!! The worst that can happen is you have to grow your hair out again. No biggie…just time.

  20. I think the photo of the “haircut” with the black bird T shirt would look great on you! When you were younger you needed the long hair like a security blanket. You are SO passed that now. The longer your hair is the longer you must spend styling it. I KNOW you’ve got more important things to do with your time. I’ve seen their beautiful faces!

  21. I love long hair , but really you look good in either long or short….just get it cut the way you like it, you are the one who has to take care of it….good luck….

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