Salt & Light

  Have you ever had a craving for cookies straight from the oven?  Oh man, you can hardly wait until they come out so you can eat one.  So steamy soft, it falls apart in your hand.

YUM, now I am hungry!   🙂

  Have you ever accidentally forgotten one, teeny tiny ingredient?  So miniscule it really shouldn’t matter, right?

SALT.

  How can something so strong, so salty, so NOT sweet, make a soft gooey chocolate chip cookie taste amazing?

  The gorgeous cookies you just made with their forgotten salt, are worthless. 

No good. 

Ready to go in the trash can. 

   We need salt in our recipes, don’t we?  Salt brings out the flavors in cheese, chicken, even cookies…….

You are the salt of the earth. But if the salt loses its saltiness, how can it be made salty again? It is no longer good for anything, except to be thrown out and trampled underfoot.    Matthew 5:13

    We live in a society that loves to be fed what they want to hear.  We surround ourselves with like-minded people, we get angry when someone posts something on Facebook we don’t agree with, asking for a dislike button or engaging in name calling.  Now even Google is in on it, filtering our search results on our past searching history, because perish the thought that we stumble across something that is contrary to our personal belief system. 

This begs the question: What right do we have to be offended at someone else’s opinion or beliefs in the first place? We certainly have the right to disagree with another’s stance, but to take a personal affront to the beliefs of another speaks to something else entirely. It’s as if we’ve adopted the type of selfish mindset that expects everyone to shape their every thought and response to what we’ve chosen to believe.  Who are we to assume that our opinions hold more value than those of another? In reality, each of us possesses the equal right to believe as we wish. We may not agree on faith or politics or a million other things, but we can be centered enough to realize that differing opinions are not a call for anger and harsh actions.  {Source}

  How can we grow, stretch, learn and change, if we are never exposed to the “other side” of life?

  If we read a blog, Facebook post, or a magazine article and it makes us feel something, good!  Lets all look inside for some self-reflection. Maybe, just maybe, we are feeling something because it applies to us in some way, like it or not. 

  Ever since the letter to iPhone mom, I have heard a lot about “Mommy Guilt”.  I didn’t know we had a special version of guilt, but apparently we do now!

  While I agree, that we Momma’s need to give ourselves, grace, grace, grace…..because we do a really hard job, but what if it’s not just Mommy Guilt?

   In my faith, we call that still small voice, the Holy Spirit. Quietly speaking to us inside, helping us not sway too far to the left or right, like those loud bumps you hit if you go too far towards the shoulder or middle line on the road.

  Maybe that guilt we think is so negative, could turn into life changing growth? Painful at first, but then the payoff…a better, well-rounded us!

   But apparently, we’d rather run off to be coddled and caressed by like-minded friends that will assure us, that we are indeed right, and the articles we read are very, very wrong. 

And off we go, on our narrow-minded path, feeling better once again, until the next thing comes our way that dare make us FEEL something……….

Salt is gritty, it is painful and burns when you get it in a cut, it sluffs off dead skin cells when used in a scrub.

  But Salt also makes things taste good, it is a natural healer and pain-killer, and it brings to light, new skin from under the old.

  Don’t you see? Salt is good, even though it hurts when applied.  Even though its rough and gritty.

Even though it tastes too salty by itself.

It has a purpose, one to bring you hope and a future.

Are you allowing “Salt” in your life? 

Simply

Allowing the

Lord

To work.

  The next time something stings, may we welcome it, look a little deeper inside, because after the sting, comes the healing and cleansing Salt offers, by simply allowing the Lord free rein to work and move in our lives.  

  I think we all could use a little more Salt with our Light…….

~T

 

Mark 9:50 “Salt is good for seasoning.  But if it loses its flavor, how do you make it salty again? You must have the qualities of salt among yourselves and live in peace with each other.”

 

Warning: “The Conjuring”

  I have always been very sensitive to evil.  I can feel it….In a person, on a show, even a book cover or movie case bothers me to the point I have to quickly look away.  Movie previews get me every single time! 

  I know now this is the prompting of the Holy Spirit, and the warning bells of evil close by.  Not everyone feels this way, and some would call me over sensitive.  Maybe you love that stuff? The heart pounding thrill it brings……I am not judging you for that, but I think its only fair that we call it what it is, dark.

 Evil.

Plain and simple. 

  This is fine for the World, right? But if you are a believer, then Christ has more to say about this subject.

  One time we watched a creepy thriller. {Now, we shut them off or avoid renting thrillers all together, but back in the day, I’d clutch Dale’s arm and we’d finish the movie, despite its fear inducing content.} Anyhow, this one particular night, after we went to bed, our DVD player kicked back on two times, and blasted Destiny’s “Elmo’s World” disc LOUDLY through the surround sound, waking us from our sleep in a panic both times.  I believe with my whole heart, that there was a demon that came out of that rented thriller movie, and was messing with us and our home. 

  We also knew it was our fault for inviting the spirit of fear in our home, so we walked and prayed out loud in every room,

  “Father, we commit this home to you.  We pray in the name of Jesus Christ our Savior, for you to fill this space.  In the name of Jesus we command all evil spirits to LEAVE!  This home belongs to Children of the King, you have no place here.” 

  It never happened again.  The whole house felt different after we prayed.  Never again would we bring a movie like that in our home.  And if it “sneaks in” under a different title, like suspense, it gets turned off immediately. 

  Have you seen the choices on Red Box lately? 

  Full of Horror movies!

  I have to avert my eyes from the pictures every time, and I sure can’t let the kids look over my shoulder anymore when I am selecting a movie to rent.

  I remember a time when the October movies in the theaters were creepy, thanks to Halloween, and a few months later they would cycle through rentals, then be gone again until the next year.  Now, its constant!  You can get a horror film as a new release year round!

   I have never actually seen the preview for “The Conjurying”.  In fact, I am not even going to link it up to my blog. If you want to see what it’s about, google it and read a review.

  Even from the other room I can FEEL this particular preview within 2 seconds of it starting. I holler out to Dale in the living room, “QUICK! TURN IT!”  He says, “I already was reaching for the remote, how did you know this preview was on again?”

I felt it, simple as that.  I didn’t hear it, I didn’t see it.  I FELT IT.

   Friends, this preview is out there for your children to see between “safe” shows on evening television.  Our kiddos rarely watch tv at night, however, when they DO, we flip it to a black screen during commercials, checking back in to see when the show re-starts. It is NOT worth it for them to see something like this!  They know to do this even if I am in the other room brushing someone’s teeth. 

This movie comes with a warning:

“psychologically and emotionally disturbing” 

  It also says that people who have attended early screenings of the film have complained about many usual circumstances that they have experienced after seeing the film.

  Ya think? 

  That my friends is called a demon.  And they come out of these movies and attach themselves to you, or your home if that is where you watch.  You invite them with an open door in the seeing and hearing of these movies.

  God’s Word comes with a warning, too:

Ephesians 4:27 “And give no opportunity to the devil…..”

Why?

  “For the grace of God has appeared, bringing salvation for all people, training us to renounce ungodliness and worldly passions, and to live self-controlled, upright, and godly lives in the present age….” Titus 2:11-12

  What does God say about what we watch?

Psalm 101:3-4 “I will not set before my eyes anything that is worthless. I hate the work of those who fall away; it shall not cling to me. A perverse heart shall be far from me; I will know nothing of evil.”

{Hmm, guess we are going to have to kick it up a notch in our home date, movie night selections too, because a lot of those have been worthless!!!!}

Isaiah 33:15 “He that walks righteously, and speaks uprightly; he that despises the gain of oppressions, that shakes his hands from holding of bribes, that stops his ears from hearing of blood, and shuts his eyes from seeing evil….”

That is pretty clear! 

  May we NEVER forget who we battle in this:

Ephesians 6:12 “For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil…...”

   Jesus asks us to be “set apart” from the ways of the World for a reason, and though its hard at times, I think we need to weigh every area of our lives against this command.

  Because if the World can peek into our home, and not see anything they can find fault with about our lifestyle or our choices, then we are doing something wrong!  

Think about it…….

  The louder the World protests our decisions, the better we are doing for the Kingdom!

~T

That 3 Letter Word…..

Today we are talking about a 3 letter word.

It begins a series on the “S” word………

SEX.

{Eeeeek!}

I know, I know, it makes people squirm and blush, but you all, as the Body of Christ, we have got to stop hiding and start talking about this!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  I have so much I want to talk to you about in this area, and I have even contacted a friend to guest post about this important topic.

We have already discussed talking to your kids about sex.  Honest and simple terms with no squirming or shaming them for asking.  If you missed it, you are in luck, your assignment for today, is to go read it here: The Birds & The Bees Post.

  I have been working on this series for 2 months now, and I have to tell you, either I have “new car syndrome” {Where you see the new-to-you-car you now drive, EVERYWHERE!} or the Lord is prompting a lot of Christian writers to write about Sex lately.  It is EVERYWHERE!

So, here are the areas we will cover over the next few weeks:

Day 1:

Sex Before of Marriage {Part 1} : Everyone is Doing It, RIGHT!? 

Sex Before Marriage {Part 2}: The Chemical Side 

Day 2:

Saving Sex for Marriage: From Forbidden Fruit to Free Rein

Day 3:

Sex Within Marriage: Desire Not Duty

Day 4:

Being Intentional In The Bedroom: The 72 Hour Challenge

Day 5:

No More Excuses {Part 1}: Overcoming Inhibitions In The Bedroom

No More Excuses {Part 2} :  23 Ways To Turn Up The Heat

Day 6:

{Part 1} Returning to Intimacy After Betrayal 

{Part 2} Sex After Infidelity: 8 Steps To Success

Day 7:

Sexual Addiction: Roadblock to Intimacy

Resources For Sex Gods Way

This series is going to knock your socks, er…pants off?!

~T

2 Years Ago Today

 What is a date on the calendar really?  

All those little squares, empty and waiting for us to fill with our busy lives.

  A place to jot notes.

 Record and remember important events like birthdays, doctors appointments, school functions, and anniversaries, we can’t forget those…..

  My calendar today has a red circle around the number 10.   

Next to it, a heart with a jagged line running through it, and a year: 2011.

The day & year of Dale’s “Truth”.

  Could it really only be 2 years ago today, that my world so drastically changed?  

It feels like a LIFETIME has gone by.

  Last year at this time, I bawled my way through the day.  Raw and having just told our story to the world, after keeping it quiet for nearly 9 months.  

  Interesting isn’t it, that just like the timeline of a newborn baby, our story took 9 months to grow and change, to prepare itself for the big reveal on April 30th, 2012.  

 You know, as I sit here and look down at my calendar, it doesn’t MEAN anything.  It doesn’t make my heart race, or skip a beat, no tears come to my eyes.  This year July 10th, is just a date on the calendar.  

  The timeline of the last two years has included brokeness, sharing, fearing our truth, then owning it loudly, obeying when it would’ve been easier to hide, loving, rebuilding, crying and laughing, good days and bad days, forgiveness and bitterness.

  But this date no longer owns me, and I am happy to tell you that today.

 Because someone, somewhere, is laboring along the same path Dale and I did, raw and broken, barely making it at times. They needed to hear this today.   I am writing to you today, broken one, to give you hope.  

  Hope that even 2 years later, just 2 short years after your truth, you CAN have victory, love, laughter, joy and peace by the supernatural healing of Christ Jesus our Lord.  

  Most counselors will tell you, that average number of years to heal from infidelity are 5-7.  And that’s ok, you take all the time you need.  But just hear me, that if you allow the Lord to lead every single step in this healing process, in the forgiveness that has to happen, then peace and joy return quickly.  Even 2 years later, you can feel whole and happy again.

  You know, maybe, just maybe, when I transfer important events to my 2014 calendar, I will skip over this one.

July 10th, 2011

  Or, maybe not.

  After all, it is a huge turning point in the timeline of our lives.

 Not for the horror it caused, but for the good that came up out of the muck and mire.  The beauty that came from deep inside those ashes.  The way our love grew deeper and stronger than we EVER thought possible.

What doesn’t break you, DOES make you stronger.

  July 10th, 2013 makes me proud of us, of how strongly we stand, united by tragedy turned triumph.  Thankful to the Lord for comforting us and carrying us after the fall.  

  Thankful that today is a glorious day, full of sunshine and joy, peace and hope………

  A date, is just a date.  

A calendar holds no meaning to our Lord, for His timeline is vastly different than our own.

I am glad for that.

~T

“Planting” Purity

  I had a 4 little Ferguson’s reader ask me a really great question yesterday, after the Drama post went live.

Tonya,
Today’s post made me start thinking about how to instill standards of purity in my daughter.
Obviously, based on Destiny’s ability to identify inappropriate content in a book, you have been able to address some of the issues of purity.
Would you be open to writing a post of what teaching purity looks like in your home, how you address it, etc?
Thanks!

Great question!

  I felt prompted to share our stance on teaching Physical Purity earlier this month, in the Train Up A Child post. 

“The Bible says, If we train up our children in the way they should go, they will not depart from it when they are older.{Proverbs 22:6}……it means I am Intentional in my parenting.  That I am always on the look out for those teachable moments. That I do my part to teach my children the value of hard work, daily duties and prayerful hearts.  That I am to speak and pray those blessings over my children just as the Fathers in the Bible spoke blessings over theirs, blessings that came to fruition.”

  I don’t think Purity is taught like a school lesson.  Although it sure wouldn’t hurt to sit down as a family and discuss what Purity is going to look like at your house.

  I think it is LIVED. 

  I think purity is in our actions, learned by our children watching us as we face the World, situation by situation. 

  It means we pepper our conversations with it, DAILY, moment by moment.

~When you shut off a movie, because it used bad language, you are teaching purity of the mind.

~When you see kissing on an otherwise clean movie and you say, “UH OH! Nooooo kissing until you are married.”  You are teaching purity of the heart and body in a few short sentences.

~ When you see a scantily clad Barbie doll in the toy aisle, you can choose the one in a full ball gown instead, “Honey, this one is dressed more appropriately.  We need to save our bodies for our husbands eyes only.”  Teaching purity in the moment.

~ When your child wants to talk about “someday” with you, use it as a teachable moment.  Tylan said, “Mom, someday I am going to get to go to a friend’s house and stay overnight?”  I replied, “Yes, Ty. But first, I want to make sure you are ready for what you might face. Your friends might want you to watch a bad movie, or look at a magazine that is not appropriate, or even try to show you naked girls on his phone.  If that happens, I want you to be ready to look away quickly, leave the room and call me for a ride home.”  “Oh ok, mom. I don’t ever want to look at that bad stuff. King David did that once……” 

Purity planting in a 6-year-old.

  On another note, ever since we had that talk with Ty at bedtime, Avery has added to her “Future Husband” prayers, that he would NOT look at his friend’s phone or bad naked pictures of girls. 

  I was Purity Seed Planting in Ty, and guess what?  4-year-old Avery’s seed took root, too.

You all, THEY ARE LISTENING TO EVERYTHING!  Make every single moment count! 

Whether we are teaching purity of the mind, “We don’t read books like that….”

Or by listening to only Christian radio or Adventures in Odyssey in the car.  We don’t want them to fill their minds with the sexual words of pop music and think its acceptable.

During Family Movie Night:

 “We are shutting this movie off now! We never use the Lord’s name in vain. It breaks His heart…..”

Or if it’s a movie you can keep watching together, then use those teachable moments: 

“Did you hear that child sass her mom?  We NEVER talk to our parents that way, do we!”

Or purity of the heart:

 “Dating that many girls only makes your heart full of holes, like Swiss Cheese.  It’s best to just be friends until the Lord shows you otherwise.”

Or purity of the body:

 “That lady IS so pretty in her dress, but see how low it scoops? When you have a dress like that, we will make sure you wear a pretty lace tank top underneath it to cover up more.”

  Once you make it a point to use any and every chance for teachable moments, you will be surprised how often they come!

  Limiting your child’s exposure to media and commercials will also help their “Radar” to be strong.  The more we expose our kids to the worlds idea of behavior and dress, the more “acceptable” it becomes in their young minds.

  Even adults are affected!  Case in point:

  I watched Grey’s Anatomy Season 1 and 2, and like a frog placed in water slowly heated, won’t jump out, I didn’t even realize how bad things were getting.  I loved the show so much, I was willing to overlook some of the inappropriate scenes I was beginning to see on a more regular basis.

  Season 3 started and I couldn’t watch it due to a conflict on Thursday nights.  When I did tune in, late in the season, I was MORTIFIED at how trashy it had gotten. I haven’t watched since.

  How did I miss it?  Did the show change, or did I?

  Somewhere along the way, the show became less medical drama, and more character drama. My radar was dulled.  The clanging bells were muffled, as I slowly became acclimated to the filth being presented there.  It took me not watching to “reset” my radar, and I was mortified when I returned to the show.

  I now choose not to watch TV in the evenings.  My time can be better spent editing, blogging or working around the house.  I enjoy the occasional Undercover Boss episode, or the other night, Dale was watching America’s Got Talent after the kiddos were down, and the singer caught my attention from the other room.  But, between my disgust in the commercials {which we don’t allow our kids to watch on the rare occasion they watch something other than PBS!} and the lack of anything good on, it’s easier for me to not watch at all.  And to teach them the same.

  They aren’t even allowed to watch “The Funny Show” {America’s Funniest Home Videos} anymore, due to the sexual jokes and harsh language from the host.

  “Planting Purity” starts with us as parents, setting the example; i/e tilling fertile soil.  This is followed by seed planting during daily, Teachable Moments.  Careful weeding will keep filth out of the garden of your child’s life and mind, and watering with the Word of God daily, will keep harvest plentiful.

In Matthew 7:16, it says you will be known by your fruits.  “You can identify them by their fruit, that is, by the way they act. Can you pick grapes from thornbushes, or figs from thistles?”

    The “fruit” of Destiny’s harvest showed yesterday.  I didn’t know if I was doing my job helping to plant the right kinds of seeds, or if I had watered enough with God’s Word. 

  But in these moments, in these situations that make us infuriated at the World we live in, we see our hard work pay off and a bountiful harvest to be thankful for.

~T

 

 

Drama

  This book looks colorful, light hearted and cute.

It is anything but. 

   

  Sweet Destiny came to me and told me she stopped reading this comic-style library book because it was too inappropriate. 

  When I asked what she meant, she told me that there was some kissing and a scene where the boy announces he is gay.  She said she knew it wasn’t one she should read anymore.

  I told her she did the right thing, and after she went to bed, skimmed the rest of the book myself.  This comic style chapter book included several making out scenes with sound effects, the previously mentioned: “I like boys, hey I am gay” scene, followed by boy on boy kissing on the stage of a play, and then to top it all off, a red-cheeked “Where have you been for 2 hours?” walking in on them scene…..

  YOU HAVE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME!

And this is a Scholastic book?  And in the children’s paperback section?

  I  know, that not all of you reading, will understand my take on this.   You will scorn me for trying to shelter my child too much.  Or tell me I am disrespecting the differences in sexual orientation.

  Listen up, my job as a Christian, is to raise my children via The Bible, God’s instruction book for us.  It is my job then, to be diligent in protecting my children from this World.

To teach them to be IN the world, yet not of it. 

  That is why we don’t have cable.  That is why we don’t watch regular evening tv shows with inappropriate commercials. I do NOT want them to become so used to our loud, buy it, need it, got to have it, politically correct or incorrect, sex sells everything World. 

  If I become lax on this, then it becomes a part of who they are, hard wired into them as “normal” everyday life.  Your kids ARE their environment.  It can’t be toxic!!!!!!  

  Satan is a sneak, even colorful cutesie paperbacks from your small town library, are not to be assumed safe anymore. I am saddened that this is occurring, and I will be returning this one to the library personally, so I can speak to the librarian about this book being in the children’s section.

  I can teach my children to respect peoples differences, to hate the sin, but love the sinner, without allowing them to absorb that lifestyle in movies, reading etc. I know they will be exposed to this world we live in eventually.  And that is a conversation I’d rather have with them on my own time, limiting their exposure to it, lest they began to believe that making out, gay lifestyle, or even the extreme violence that is showcased everywhere, is tolerated.

  And yes to me, the making out in that book bothered me as much as the gay agenda. We are trying to teach purity of heart, mind and body…this book promoted none of these things.

  I know that I cannot pre-read all 30-50 of Destiny’s library chapter books that I help her select, its just not feasible to do this every 3 weeks on library day. 

  I think the fact that she still knew what to do, shows that you can teach your child what to expect from the World we live in by peppering it in all your daily conversations, give instruction on the action you’d like them to take when they come across something they feel is wrong, i/e a racy picture, bad words, inappropriate actions, and come out positive in the end.

   Our job is to equip our children for this World they reside in, and right now, that is done by setting boundaries and expectations for what COULD come their way.  As much as I want to, I cannot hide them in a bubble.  But I can make sure they are growing up in a safe, open and honest, God filled life while they are here at home with me.

  So, what is your take on this as a parent?  

~T

 

Train Up A Child…..

  The Bible says, If we train up our children in the way they should go, they will not depart from it when they are older.
{Proverbs 22:6}

  So, what does this look like?  “Train up a child”

  Well, I think it means I am Intentional in my parenting.  That I am always on the look out for those teachable moments. That I do my part to teach my children the value of hard work, daily duties and prayerful hearts.  That I am to speak and pray those blessings over my children just as the Fathers in the Bible spoke blessings over theirs, blessings that came to fruitition.

   One area I have been struggling with lately, is praying for their future spouse.  I have diligently been doing this since each child is born, diligently like EVERY SINGLE NIGHT. Purity is a big, big deal to me, something I held dear to my heart in my growing up years.  Something I knew I wanted for my children.  Something I wish Dale would’ve chosen differently on.  We represent both sides, saving and not saving.  Our kids will have the opportunity to hear of the long term heartache that comes from sex outside of marriage.

  My prayers of 9 years have been this:

  First, for my child to be a Godly man or Proverbs 31 wife, then for them to save themselves for marriage, by hanging on to their purity for the treasure it is.  To save all the pieces of their heart for their ONE true love.  To allow the Lord to bring them that person when the time is right, when they are both ready.  To choose to court instead of date.  To allow the Lord to script them a beautiful love story.

  In the past 2 years of Surviving Infidelity, I have learned purity will not save my children from heartache.  It won’t. It’s not a guarantee.  The reward doesn’t necessarily look like I thought it would.  And as I learn more and more about the hold porn has on our men, and our teen and preteen boys, I have lost heart.  So instead of praying about it, I was mourning the odds of my children finding pure spouses.  If 1 out of 3 teens look and 4 out of 5 men in your church pew look, then its a lost cause.  Right?

  Then the Lord reminded me of John 14:14 “You may ask me for anything in my name, and I will do it.”

  This doesn’t mean He is a genie in a bottle, grant me my 3 wishes!  It means that when I pray something I KNOW He backs with scripture, that I need to believe it will happen, and it will.

  “I tell you the truth, if anyone says to this mountain, ‘Go, throw yourself into the sea,’ and does not doubt in his heart but believes that what he says will happen, it will be done for him.”
Mark 11:23

  I am asking the Lord to, somewhere out in the world, raise up a little boy, or a little girl, ready to marry my children.  Being raised in a home that speaks blessings, and prays diligently for their children’s purity, for my children as their children’s future spouses.  A family that is aware of satan lurking on the internet, billboards and scantly clad women/men on tv.  I am asking they be raised in a family that is real about this trap of porn, that talks regularly about the importance of pure eyes in the world we live in today.

  Tylan is in Kindergarten.  He just turned 6, do you know that he prays for his wife already?  Did you know that he asks me what he should do if his friends show him pictures that are bad?  You may think that is too young, but I am glad.  It will be hard wired in him to look away, leave the room, call me for a ride.  It doesn’t mean he won’t fall or fail at times, but it means that even from a young age, those thoughts of purity are taking root.

Did you know, that Avery asks me if that Barbie’s outfit is “inapwopiate” in the store toy aisle because she is wearing a skimpy mini skirt and tummy showing halter top?  Instead of telling her not to worry about it, we talk about modesty, and covering tummies and breasts. Saving our bodies for our husband. I don’t think she is too young to know the truth about this.

  Parents, your children are listening to you, your prayers at bedtime need to MEAN something.  Not just thank you for this day, please help Johnny to have good dreams and no bad dreams. Amen.  

  No, think of it as seed planting, carefully tended each night, until you will watch it sprout and grow. Someday, your child will parrot those same prayers for themselves, then walk it out in their lives.

  Do not lose heart, for I have overcome the world.  {from John 16:33}

Praise you Jesus,

~T

Need help knowing how to pray over your kids? 

I suggest this book:  While They Are Sleeping: 12 Character Traits to Pray for the Children You Love

    I have used this for almost 10 years and my copy is falling to pieces, but it covers areas from purity to leadership, kindness to humility, courage & contentment.  Each topic includes several days worth of prayers to read out loud and 2 verses to back it.   You could read it with your spouse as part of your devotions, or include it in your child’s bedtime routine, so they hear you pray over them, these qualities.

 

 

Love. Wins.

The lines under her eyes tell a story…….

They speak of Weariness. 

Loss. 

Strength. 

A great War, Waged and Won.

The strength of his stance speaks of great Courage,

The shine in his eyes a testament of Hope.

A man who has faced his demons head on,

A man who has Victory.

These Pictures weave a story of a Love,

Shattered & Lost,

Found & Reclaimed,

Reborn & Renewed. 

These pictures may not shout of the tragedy, tears, broken hearts, or broken dreams……

Instead, they whisper…..

that in the rubble of a broken marriage,

In the mess and sorrow of it all,

Hope was born.

Just a glimmer at first.

  Too fragile to even move towards touching it, lest it be snuffed out……

But it grew.

It grew stronger and brighter until it was grasped with two hands,

Two hearts crying out for healing. 

Crying out for Wholeness.

Reaching for a Love, Deeper than ever before.

Brokeness made into Strength.

Tears turned into Courage.

Hope springing into Laughter

and Love,

The kind that goes down deep with its roots. 

For it has weathered a ferocious storm,

And strong it stands,

On Promises anew.

2 circles unbroken.

Promises of forever.

Whispers under the covers,

Water fights in the kitchen,

A hug at the end of a long day.

Freedom.

Fidelity.

And Hope.

Always Hope.

Even in the midst of utter Despair.

In the angry moments of WHY?

In the sad moments of quiet acceptance of a “Truth” I don’t want,

In the heart swelling moments of a Love

So deep…..

So great, that it brings tears to your eyes.

In the moments I forget to Forgive,

In the moments I don’t.

Hope is there,

Underneath it all.

Hope in Jesus.

In a new Creation….

In Brokeness made Whole.

For behold, He makes all things NEW.

  Happy 11th Anniversary {tomorrow} to the LOVE of my life……

I know we are weary.

I know the road to total healing is a long one. 

I know we are still working out the kinks of this new life of ours. 

 

But, never, ever forget, that…..

I. Choose. Us. 

Now,

Always,

I give you all of me….

From now until forever. 

Because Love Wins.

Do you hear that?

~T

Story starts here: http://www.4littlefergusons.wordpress.com/surviving-infidelity/

Photos by the talented Melissa. Check out her blog, Voice, for more of her amazing work!!!!

 

Paxton’s Born Again Birthday!

    We try to pepper our conversations around here with talk of the Lord, choosing today who you will serve {Ty says, you have to pick if you are on God’s Team or satan’s team} and the promise of an eternity in Heaven.  As a result, all of our children have had a very clear concept of Heaven and Hell from toddler years on.  Some people believe that this is too early for them to grasp Salvation and all it means, and while I agree that yes, some concepts are larger than their capability, I will never ever walk away from the chance to pray the Salvation prayer with a child who comes to me with NO prompting, and begins to ask about it.  The matters of the heart are the Lords, not mine, to judge.

  We have been talking a lot more about death and life, Heaven and Hell lately, since my Grandpa passed away.  It was no surprise then, that on my way to preschool from the backseat, Paxton was talking about Jesus and Grandpa up in Heaven.

  “Jesus up in Heaben…..”

Yes, buddy He sure is.

  “Jesus in my Heart?”

No, not yet, but someday you will ask Him in your heart.

“Jesus in the kids’ hearts?  And Mommy & Daddy’s hearts?”

Yes, your brother and sisters have asked Jesus in their hearts. And Mommy & Daddy too…

“I asked Jesus in my heart….”

No, not yet, someday when you are big.

“Paxton ask Jesus in his heart?!”

Yup, someday you will ask Jesus in your heart.

  After a few more minutes of talking, I realized he wasn’t going to drop it. 

Paxton, do you want to ask Jesus in your heart?

“Yeah, I DO!!!!”

  Ok, then repeat after me:

Dear Jesus,

Dear Jesus….

Please come into my heart to live, please forgive me for my sins and be my Savior. Amen.

He repeated after me beautifully, and with pounding heart and teary eyes, I caught his glance in the rear view mirror and told him how PROUD I was of him!  That he was a CHRISTIAN now!  And that Jesus and the angels were having a Born Again Birthday Party in Heaven.  That God wrote his name in the Book of Life, and that meant one day, he would get to go live with Jesus.

  We get to preschool to pick up Avery and he runs right up to her teacher Miss Melissa and tells her his big news….. 

“Miss Lissa! Jesus in mine heart!!!!!”

    Miss Melissa and Avery were so excited for him! We couldn’t wait to come home and call Daddy and tell him the good news. 

  Later that afternoon, Paxton woke up from naps and raced out to remind us all again that he had Jesus in his heart! He was so proud to tell Destiny when she got home from school, too.

  Here is a video of him telling us about it again over dinner…….

Please excuse the food in his mouth. Mommy has bad timing!  🙂

   To commemorate this great event, we write the children’s Born Again Birthdays on the calendar, so we can honor and celebrate them again and again.  Sometimes we do a Born Again Birthday Cake for them all to share in the smack middle of all their special days {cause that’s a lot of sugar!}, other times if we are having a special dessert anyways, then we will do individual celebrations, complete with candle.  You can decide those family traditions as you go, we just want them to remember and honor that special LIFE changing day forever. 

Helping to lead your child to Christ is such a big moment, excited but kind of daunting too.  Is there a right or wrong way to do it?  What if we mess up, does it count?  All normal questions, with simple answers:

  Want a simple way to help your children understand Salvation?

Try the ABC’s…. {From our Bible School curriculum 2 years ago}

A Admit we are sinners.

B Believe God sent Jesus to die on the cross for our sins.

C  Claim Jesus as Lord of your life. This means you act different from the world, and show God’s love to those around you in all you say and do. 

   After our children have accepted Jesus in their hearts, we tell them that the Lord has washed their hearts clean from the ugly “weeds” of sins.  (this gives a good reference point later, when our children tell a lie, that a weed grew in their heart when they told that lie.)  The only way to get that weed out, is to say sorry for their sin to their Heavenly Father, and He’ll clean it out and make it beautiful again.

  The second thing we talk about, is that God has opened His BIG book, called the “Book of Life” and has written their name in it! That means someday, when Jesus comes back for us, or when they die, they are welcome into Heaven.  WOW, how exciting!

  Then we tell them that the Angels are dancing and having a Praise Party up in Heaven.

Why?

Well, they are celebrating a Born Again Birthday!  Because today you were Born Again, fresh and clean without sin.  Not in your Mommy’s tummy, but in your HEART, a new life in Christ this time!

  Once our children become Christians, they are also allowed to partake in Communion at Church.  After so many years of being passed by, this is a big deal at our house!  We make sure they understand, it’s NOT snack time, it represents the body and blood of Jesus, and the life He gave so they could have eternal life.

I am one proud Momma of 4 little born again believers, who put their trust in a really BIG God, that they now all serve as their Lord and Savior.

Praise His name!

~T

I didn’t have a blog back in the year of Destiny’s salvation story, but you can click on the other children’s names to read their Born Again Birthday stories…..

Destiny, almost 3: June 30th, 2006
Tylan, age 3: October 20, 2010
Avery, age 2: November 11, 2010
Paxton, age 2 1/2: May 15th, 2013

 

A Day of Remembering…..

  My Grandpa’s funeral was last Saturday, May 4th, it already seems like a lifetime ago.  I decided this weekend, that I was ready to go through photos and share them. 

    I haven’t been to many funerals in my life.  I thought the viewing would be hushed and quiet, and that my kids may not be welcomed there for long.  It was amazing to me how LOUD and joyous it actually was!  Even the funeral director came up to me and said how they loved families like ours, that had hope and peace and even JOY in the midst of sorrow.  He said he could tell we all really loved and enjoyed each other.  From a man who deals in death? That is a real compliment!

  I only have pictures from the afternoon, when I went to set up the Memorial Table for Grandpa.  I wanted it to represent him down to the tiniest details, so we did everything from his Bible and magnifying glass, to the combs and hair clips he used to control his wavy hair….

  Of course we included his rocks and beautiful creations from them, his cologne truck & hammer that have been on his dresser all my 32 years, and his Lemonhead candies.  The clock was set to the exact time he left this world for Paradise.

  We had pictures of our Scooter Parade, which was displayed with his red suspenders, and we couldn’t forget his famous Golf Club-Turned-Walking Stick…..

Dale brought the kids right after school pick up. I wanted them to have a few private moments to see their Great Grandpa for the last time.  They were a teeny bit anxious to come in, wondering what they would see.

They all lined up in front of the casket….

  After a few moments of quiet, Paxton says:

Gwandpa in HEABEN wiff JESUS???????????  {Grandpa in Heaven with Jesus?}

He RAAAAN up to me to tell me again, Louder this time, where his beloved Grandpa was:

Gwanpa Up der, in Heaben! 

  You can’t tell me children cannot understand death, because I watched it happen in the most peaceful, beautiful way last week.

  Bright and early the next morning, was the burial.  It was SO freezing cold, like 32*!  Not Spring-like weather at all, we bundled up as best we could.  I was honored to be a pallbearer, along with 7 of the 8 cousins.

  See that photo of Paxton? Top right of the above collage.  That is “Grandpa” Glen, he is the husband of our beloved “Gramma” Esther, who went to be with Jesus just 8 hours after my Grandpa.  It was wonderful to have him here to pay tribute to Grandpa in spite of his own grief and loss.

   Inspite of the cold wind whipping around in the tent, it was a beautiful little mini service out there at the grave site.

  I loved when the Pastor laid his hand on the casket and said something about how,

“Our Heavenly Father knew when Maurice would come into this world and take his first breath, but he also knew the exact moment he would leave this world and take his last breath.”

  That is so comforting!  Our lives are carefully planned out, every moment from first breath to last. 

You saw me before I was born. Every day of my life was recorded in your book. Every moment was laid out before a single day had passed.  Psalm 139:16

The children were very curious about how the box with Grandpa’s body in it would go down into the ground, so sweet Grandma agreed to do it right then.  The emotions of that moment played out beautifully on her face….

Goodbye for now, my love, goodbye for now…..

   Then it was time to head across town to have the Memorial Service.
So many Godly men stood and spoke of the life of my Grandpa and the impact he left on them!

   The Grandkids had a chance to share…..there was much laughter, and many tears shed from that pulpit.

I said:

  When I think of Grandpa, my mind goes back to my memories of him when I was a child.  His rough hands gave the best back rubs, I remember the jingling sound of the ever-present keys on his belt, as he took his jaunty steps, hurriedly out of the room.  The way he hopped onto his black bike that he rode all over Glencroft.  The whistle that always slipped with ease from his mouth as he worked.

  But over the years, my fondest memories have changed, grown in ways I never imagined, as I watched my Grandpa become a Great Grandpa to my 4 children.

  I will never forget the way his eyes would light up when they’d come piling into the room, each one taking their turn to give him a hug.  I loved how he asked about school and their day.  How he begged them to come visit again soon.  How he’d get out his rocks and tell what each one was.  How he’d tell them story after story about when he was a little boy, never irritated when they begged for MORE.  And the songs, oh how we loved the songs he sang. “Up Up In The Sky,” “My Mommy Said” and “Mousy” are now passed down to the next generation of children.

  But my favorite memory of all was our Scooter Parade, we did it several different occasions.  He would bundle up so he could ride around and around the block with my kids. He and Pax on his electric scooter, the others on their bikes and trikes.  I don’t know whose grin was bigger, theirs…….or HIS. 

  Memories of my grandpa will live on, echoing through the walls of my home when laughter rings out, in the rock collections in the children’s treasure boxes, in the bedtime songs we sing, and always, always in our hearts as his life and legacy will live on in the memories of my children.

   I want to take a minute, and give them a chance to tell you about their Great Grandpa…..

My brave kiddos came up on stage, proud to tell everyone about this special man in their lives:

Destiny: He always told the best stories!

Tylan: I like that he is fun and he shares his rocks with us.

Avery: I like his smile!

Pax: Grandpa is in Heaven running with Jesus!

I finished with this:
We know that good-bye is never really good-bye, not when you have the hope of Jesus.  Goodbye is really just “So long for now.”
                         So we say So long for now, Grandpa, so long for now……

   Isn’t that the beauty of our faith and Salvation in Christ?  The knowledge that we WILL see our loved ones again, in a beautiful, perfect and joyous place!

  I know this is long, please remember this blog is the story of my children’s lives, one I want them to be able to reference and read and remember one day.  Before I go, I have one more thing I want to share on here.  I worked many, many nights on this video slide show. I stopped counting hours at 16, but the important thing is, it came from my heart.  It was how I dealt with my grief and the many, many tears I shed while making it and editing it.  This was my way of showing my love and respect to my Grandpa, and I’d be honored to have you watch.

Blessings to you today,

~T