Things Heard in My Home

Tylan to Avery: “O-M-O-M spells Mom.”
Tylan then asks me: “Is that how you spell it in cursive?”

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Avery: “Hey Nana! Watch dis!!!!”  (Nana is talking to Avery on the phone.)

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Tylan:  “Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow!” 

What’s wrong buddy?

“My finger is hurt! OWWWW!”

Let me see.  Oh my goodness Ty!  That’s only marker. 

 Very disapointed…..”Oh.”

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Avery with an accent: “Ima cowboy.  Howdy DUDE!”

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Avery: “Ho-ly Cooow!” 
Ty: “Avery that is a bad word.  Bad words break God’s heart……Mom, do we say holy cow?”

Yes Tylan, you can say holy cow. 

“What about Holy Moley?”

Sure, you can say holy moley.

“Oh.  Never mind Avery.  You can say it.”

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Tylan: “Can we listen to Michael Blueberry?”  (Michael Buble’)

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Avery:  “Mom. Mom. MOM. MOMOMOMOMOM.”

WHAAAAAT?! 

“You my best fwiend.” 

<Total guilt> Awww! Thanks baby!

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Ty: “M-ooooom!  Avery’s not looking at me!”  

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<Avery slinks by totally in the buff>

Avery Lyn! Where are your clothes?  

Avery shrugs: “I need to be naked.”

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Ty! Did you swallow your gum?     

“No, I just chewed it in my tummy.”

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Ty: “Mom, I want to be a doctor when I grow up so I can help people.”

That is great Tylan!  How about you Avery?  What do you want to be when you grow up?

Avery: “Awee, supa man gwrl!” (Avery super man girl)

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Ty: “Mom, I know how to spell 7!!” 

 Oh yeah?  How?  

Ty, super excited: “5 & 2!!!!!!”

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Ty at prayer time:  “Dear God, thanks for PopTarts, Bars & Bla-nana’s. A-men!”

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Ty, clean up your toys.

Cheerfully says: “Yes mom!” and walks away. Looks up and quietly adds, “Yes God”.       🙂

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That’s it Avery!!  You are GROUNDED from Rice Krispies! 

(Don’t ask! Loooong story)

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Ty: “Mushrooms are healthier than carrots.” 

How do you know? 

Ty sheepishly shrugs:  ” I don’t, I just made it up.”

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That’s it from my house, until next time…..
~T

P.S.

Here are the same 2 kiddos a year ago hanging out in the same location……Can you BELIEVE the difference a year can make?

Things Heard in My Home…..

 A peek (a listen?) into my home……

“No, you may not have TV time until all your chores are completed.”

“Avery, quit picking your nose, it’s gross.”

“Destiny, repeating “Hey mom” 20 times to tell me something, will not get you the kind of attention you are seeking.”

“Ty, quit honking your pee pee.”

“Paxton, why are you fussing? Here, have a binky.“

“Avery! I can tell you are still picking your nose, even if you turn your back to me.”

“Ty! Quit! Do you have to pee or something? Go potty!”

“No Avery, I do not want your “booder”, go get a Kleenex and wash your hands…..”

“Oh my goodness, who dumped out all the clean, folded laundry in here?”

“Tylan, don’t come out of the bathroom with your pants still down.“

“Paxton! Seriously, quit spitting your bink out…….Oh, its past the 3 hour mark, no wonder you are so fussy, it’s time to feed you, again!!!!“

“Tylan! Go wash your hands. We always wash after we use the bathroom.”

“Destiny, stop jumping rope next to your sister, you keep hitting her.”

“Can someone bring mommy the phone? No, you can’t answer it, just bring it to me!”

“No Tylan, it was NOT your turn to talk. It was a call for mommy.“

“Listen here mister, if you want to cry, then I will give you a reason to cry.”

“Eww, whose poopy?”

“Ty… Quit Crying! Go sit on your Boo-hoo bed until the happy Ty comes back.”

“Avery, go get me a diaper, you are stinky!”

“Destiny, have you done your homework? No playing until you do your homework!”

“Who dumped all these puzzles out?!?!?!?!?!?!?!”

“Avery! Where are your socks? It’s too cold for bare feet, now go find them!”

“Destiny, you are NOT the mommy, you may NOT hand out strikes or punishments!”

“Can’t mommy have privacy when she goes to the bathroom? Quit pounding on the door! I‘ll be out in a second….”

“Of course it’s stinky, no one invited the 3 of you in here…..Now, go play!”

“Avery, you cannot wear your flip-flops, its winter time. GO find your SOCKS!”

“Destiny. Homework. Now.”

“Now who is poopy? Eww, Pax! Why do you always have to poop UP? What a mess!”

“Avery, quit making your big brother cry…”

“Destiny! Why didn’t you make your bed this morning? Go make it now.”

“I need FIRST TIME OBEDIENCE!”

“Avery, where are your clothes?!?!?!?!?!”

DA-AAAAAAAALE! Come deal with YOUR kids……..”

 

Wishing you a fan-tabulous Tuesday….

~T 🙂